Father Day pt 2

This one is about my sons father. I figure get the hard ones out first, and then we can move on to happiness. Enjoy! xoxo

its 4 am and you're still alone

laying in bed

as far away from sleep as possible

how could he do this to you?

anxiety pulses through your veins

anger flows through your heart

and confusion paralyzes you

you love him

and you thought he loved you

but here you lie alone

carrying his child

while he's out with her

you wonder what his excuse will be this time

what dirty lie will come out his mouth

the mouth you have kissed

and loved

he belongs to you

and he's out with her

the confusion hurts your body

you hold your breathe and wait

wait for the pain to pass

you are startled by a sound

and you realize you're sobbing

again

your unborn child kicks

and your heart hurts

this isn't how it's supposed to be

you had visions of family

and joy

and love

confusion and hurt and agony

weren't any part of your plan

and here they are,

in control of you

baby moves inside your womb again

as if to give you the love you need

but how do you love right now?

how do you give your precious creation

the love he deserves

how do you survive this?