Letters to a younger Lizzy
Dear 6 yr old me,
I know you're scared, but it'll get better. I promise. Not for a while, but it will. So for now take care of your sisters, they'll need you to distract them. Stay strong missy
Dear 13 yr old me,
I know you feel uncomfortable at home. You only have a couple years left. She will leave him. I know you're angry with her for broken promises, but one day you will understand how scary of a situation it is for her too. Don't be too hard on her. She will leave him. It's going to get real bad for the next couple years, so when your aunt moves back home in the next couple months, hang out with her as much as you can. And your grandparents will take you in whenever you need a safe zone. Your gramma will forever have your back. Remember this, you will need this info repeatedly over the next decade.
Dear 15 yr old me,
It's time to breathe. You're going to be angry for a long while, and that's ok. You're allowed to have emotions about everything now. Be as angry as you need to be, but remember your gramma has your back. You can say anything to her, and she understands you. Same with your aunt. Talk it out, because if you don't you will lose your shit. in the worst way possible. And dude, lay off the boys. They are all bad news, and only want one thing from you. You will get hurt if you keep acting the way you are around them.
Dear 16 yr old me,
You are not alone. I know you feel you are, but you are not. Try to not be so angry with her. I realize she broke her promise to you girls of "no men, just us girls for a while" but he is a good man. A very good man. Give him a chance. He will change your life for the better and you will be grateful. And once again, lay off the dudes. and do you have to party so much? You will regret some of these choices you're making when you're older. So tone it down.
Dear 17yr old me,
He is going to hurt you. I realize there is a bigger purpose for this one to be in your life. but he is going to hurt you. So prepare yourself. You are going to learn a lot about yourself and about life, and about love (or what isn't) during your relationship with him. And you are going to end up a single mom. I know you promised yourself this would never happen to you, but it will. In the hardest way possible. So be prepared.
Dear 20yr old me,
Breathe. You feel scared, and angry, and weak, and you want to give up, except you have this beautiful baby to take care of. and even tho he cries, and eats constantly, and sucks all your energy, you know you have to do this for him. Breathe woman. You can do this. Even tho you don't feel like it right now, you are one strong bitch, and you are not going to let some lying selfish douchebag win. You are a fighter. But on the morning of your 21st bday, when you are exhausted and need some sleep, do not call him to come over, you will regret that fight for the rest of your life. Call your mother for help instead. She does care even if she acts like she doesn't. For real.
Dear 23 yr old me,
This horrible pregnancy is almost over. You are amazing. Being pregnant single mom was a bitch, and as much as you want this damn baby out of you, try to enjoy being pregnant. Because it's not going to happen again, and it will make you sad that you never enjoyed it. Once that daughter of yours is born, you are going to have her father around a bunch and life is going to get interesting. Did I not tell you a decade ago to lay off the boys? Geez woman. It will be hard, but the two of you will figure it out, and it will transform itself into a very good thing. I promise. He will understand you and let you be your crazy self, and love you for it. He will make you laugh when you feel like the world is ending. So just breathe. You will not be single mommy of two for long. It will be ok. Life gets happy soon. You deserve it. So calm the eff down and enjoy being pregnant. I'm very proud of you.
Dear 25 yr old me,
You deserve this happiness so quit being worried it's going to go away. You've fought enough and deserve some good, so calm down and enjoy this. Stop worrying. You'll get wrinkles.
xoxo,
Lizzy
